 Many years ago, a colleague of mine, a Clinical Psychologist, expressed interest in what was then known as Mutliple Personality Disorder (MPD) and today is termed Dissociative Identity Disorder ( DID). She waffled between belief and doubt in the diagnosis, its origin and the veracity of the stories of some survivors. What I noticed more than her words, was the hint of fear in her eyes at the thought of interacting with hostile, violent parts/alters should this arise in her office. Another friend who, after our student days together majoring in Clinical Psychology is now running a Clinic of her own. She told me she had never had a Multiple in her case load or seen one in her Clinic. I happen to know the area where she works and that it is a hot bed for Cult activity so wonder if there have not been survivors struggling with DID whose condition simply has not been recognized. Perhaps there has been misdiagnosis and my friend HAS encountered a Multiple without recognizing them as being so. The outstanding element to me in our discussion was her questioning the TRUTH of a mind that would split into a few to many hundreds of parts and fragments because of abuse. It seemed hard for the concept to register that abuse could be horrific enough to produce this phenomenon. I have had other Mental Health Professionals quiz me, some with amusement, some with curiosity, others with open disbelief bordering on outright dennouncement, and a few who seemed to have a genuine interest in learning what Multiplicity really encompasses. It is my conviction that the bedrock of sound and effective treatment for a Mutliple is founded in BELIEF, and the bedrock for Society's denial of, and resistance to, DID is cemented in one word. DISBELIEF. If we, as Therapists, do not believe the stories our clients bring to us in their desperate search for someone to truly listen and HEAR what they are saying, the therapy starts with a dead end. This is not discounting or denying that Malingering and Pathological Lying etc., exist because they do. But therapists unfamiliar with DID and rigid in their theoretical approach will misdiagnose time and time again to the continued decompensation of the client. Mismedication can result and therapy will be flawed if treatment is planned according to an evaluation underpinned and undermined by Disbelief . The secrecy that shrouds all activites perpetrated by Cult and Non Cult abusers protects them from accountability of their rituals and torture. It is this secrecy that condemns the survivor who must dissociate to stay alive while experiencing heineous crimes, to face a Society, and within that Society the segment of Mental Health Professionals, where their history of abuse is consigned to an over active imagination, false memories, attention seeking and a plethora of other invalid reasons. So the question remains - why is it that a diagnosis of Pathological Lying, or Malingering is guarenteed a hearing and probability, but Dissociative Identity Disorder gets allotted to the Last-on-the-List slot? Why DISBELIEF, or professed disbelief ? WHAT IS IT GROUNDED IN? For the Therapist, could it be: * Fear of the unknown? * Counter transference of unresolved issues in the Therapist ? * Lack of exposure to Multiplicity? * Short reference with no indepth study during college and training? * Aligning with Disbelief in DID in fellow therapists and supervisors? (peer pressure)? * The ubiquitous snail pace of accepting a new theory or paradigm ? * Fear of losing licensure because of accusations brought by relatives and/or clients? * Lack of true Listening skills? * Focussing on personal agenda rather than the client's? *Inability to absorb trauma in the extreme? * Fear of testifying in court where few cases in favor of a Multiple have ever been won ? The list is endless, and for the lay person, the centrality of the FEAR of what is strange, seemingly bizzarre, abnormal, crazy,in THEIR opinion, will block belief and promote total avoidance of the topic and the person. Someone once asked, " Who is normal?" The problem with so many of us Monos (Singletons) - ( we think we are ONE !) in that we do not admit to having more than one side/part to us. How many times have we been told, " relax - learn how to play. Let your inner child have some fun". I, personally, love allowing the child in me to do child things, especially with other children, like swinging with them, playing tag, watching monkeys, whatever. Every parent who plays with their child or children, is allowing the child part of them to come out and be "little". Mom and Dad sitting on a see-saw while the kids look on and laugh at them - adult bodies using child toys. Are we Monos normal because we can play with impunity and even be praised for entertaining children? People watching us play see an adult body doing child things - and this is normal? I was in a restaurant once with a Multiple friend and while we were lining up to get our food, a Little came out for the first time, smiled shyly at me, took my hand and said, " Can you be my Grandma?". People watching would see an adult body doing a child thing - taking hold of "grandma's" hand - is this abnormal? Putting aside the often mistaken idea that two women holding hands are, of course, lesbians, ( and this is NOT in any way a slight on lesbians), there is actually NO difference in any behavior that depicts child behavior. NO difference in that there is ONE adult body responding as a child would to something it likes. The DIFFERENCE is what the public believes is ABnormal vs Normal. Watching a Dad screaming like a teenager on a roller coaster ride and ACTING like one - who's to say if the man is Mono or Multiple simply by watching his behavior? Is he letting out the teenage part of him or is there a teenage alter enjoying the Amusement Park ? Does one believe anything the Dad would say because we KNOW he is a Mono, or is he DISbelieved because we know he is a Multiple? The point is - Monos can lie to avoid embarrassment or to give an impression and Mutliples can tell the truth. Conversely, a Part might lie to avoid being hurt and a Mono will tell the truth. I think People with DID are often more truthful than we are, in that the parts tell exactly what happened to them when they feel safe enough to do so, whereas, so often, we Monos will elaborate, exaggerate, minimize or downright lie about things rather than admit to something that would be humiliating in the relating, or that we would rather not disclose. Bottom line - perhaps Disbelief could come into the picture because we Monos fear being totally honest with ourselves and it is easier to say a Mutliple is imagining things or in a fantasy world than to face our own reality. OR - do we disbelieve because we cannot solve, explain, interpret DID at the extreme end of the dissociation spectrum? OR , when it comes to Satanic/Sadistic Ritual Abuse and Mind Control experiments, (well documented for public perusal) it is easier to Disbelieve these exist than to admit to the reality that people in highest circles and prestigious Offices as well as the people next door, could be capable of so abusing a child or adult they have to create parts or alters to manage the humanly unimagineable. OR do we disbelieve because Multiplicity is something we cannot control, do not understand and therefore pooh pooh it because we refuse to acknowledge it is beyond us to simplify it to our own satisfaction? OR as Therapists is it possible to find a more plausible diagnosis for a set of symptoms that describe one well known and acceptable for reasons known only to ourselves, rather than write Dissociative Identity Disorder? OR as the ordinary person in the daily rat race, do we disbelieve there is such a thing as DID even though we have watched the movie, Sybil or read the book Three faces of Eve, and think it some way out good-for-a-movie story but not in my world ? OR is there a latent fear that WE might be multiple and denial is expressed in disbelief ? This writing is not in any way meant to be more than my personal musings on why it is so hard for Monos, and particularly Therapists in whose hand lies acceptance or rejection, to believe not in a set of criteria listed in the DSM1V-R but much more importantly, in a HUMAN BEING no different from ourselves. Men, women and children called Multiples, whose "normality" lies in exactly the same emotions, thoughts, reactions, behaviours, desires and dreams that we, as Monos, experience. The difference being that for the Multiple, these traits and characteristics are multiplied in correlation to the need for someone to take abuse too much to bear by one. Surely, whether our emotions, our humor, our thinking is evoked in one or many, what grounds are there truly, for someone to disbelieve the validity of them? Disbelief is crippling to anyone who is trying to be understood no matter if they are Multiple or Mono - and especially in the therapeutic arena. For me, it is the client's agenda that takes priority and if I am listening carefully it is possible to change disbelief into belief and in doing so, start the arduous journey to healing with someone who has many USs within one body. Goessoftly Retired Therapist www.goessoftlyishere.com (permission for reprints is required)     | Normalizing and Demystifying DID | DID and Littles.(Child/Young Alters) | ISOLATION | Mono's Disbelief | Distortion: Good and Evil | ASPECTS OF BODY CHANGES | Relationships | Across The Board | Across The Board | FORGIVENESS | I am BAD | Headaches | LYING AND DECEPTION | LOST and LOSS | EYES | Controversy. 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